starting fresh...

hey bloggers.....i am still new here. so i rasa kalau ada kekurangan atau masih tidak menarik maafkan nyer...heheheheh....Ekceli i pnh ada satu blog dulu....after 2 postings, i tak online dah. Lama sgt tak buka terus lupa password...camner tu? heheheheh....
Why i start again?
Simple jer....i cuba utk mencari a new channel utk meluahkan rasa hati dan speak my mind. Setelah mencapai usia 30 on the 26th July ari tu, i tlh berazam utk mengubah segala. The planning was not based on what i want actually tetapi lebih kpd utk menjaga hati seseorg. Walaubagaimana pun, chewah...rasa karang esei masa sekolah plak dah.....An event berlaku dan telah menyedarkan i that i hv wasted 4 years of my life. Well things happens, semua atas kesalahan i sendiri kot. I was never aware of anything (in that case la), i terlalu alpa. I telah banyak menolak peluang yg mungkin dpt mengubah hidup i ke arah yg ke lebih baik, tapi i telah memilih satu jln yg i rasa senang utk i lalui demi utk mencapai yg diingini. But in the end semua tak berguna. I guess every human made their own mistakes and all human have flaws and all.
Dari dulu lagi i hv self-esteem issues. I have always have doubt in myself. The only time i have full confidence and thought that i will feel that way in the future was on my last bday. It was a beautiful sunday and it made me truly love myself as me. I guess each one of us have that feeling once and awhile...As i told u b4, an event berlaku that made me pull myself back again where i am used to be.
Yerla, bertahun u try to achieve something then u tak dpt of coz la kecewa kan. u tot it was there, it was reachable. Well reality check masuk campur, i was not even close to it. Yerla maybe i terlupa diri dan terlupa mencerminkan diri sendiri....(mmg jarang pun tgk cermin) hehehehe

I am tryin to build up that is in me from zero. I know its not easy especially dlm usia yg dh smp petang nie...hehehehe But i am tryin as hard as i am....Cuba utk react as normal as i am. Kita semua mesti pernah berfikir that life is goin our way and it path itself for you. But now i know it the hard way ( hancur nyer hati berkecai punya cara...hehehe) that life really have everything for you, u just perlu utk mencari ur own path to go thr. More like The Amazing Race show tu.....

Buat masa sekarang i dont really believe in kehidupan bunga2 full of love and all. Yeah i have family and friends yg betul2 i syg. Tapi life will crawl into u when u least expected and cuba utk menguji diri u. I am big baby...i cry so easy heheheheh....so i handle myself wt that. Crying is a method to release tension...utk i la...taklah menanges meraung. tapi tetiba air mata tu turun jer...stimes i sendiri tak sedar. Terutama i ada melihat benda yg very distrubing to me and kalau ada org sakitkan hati. And oh yah...kalau terlalu excited pun i akan nanges heheheheh....siyol kan heheheh...nanges jer keje....
well that is me! the closest to me knows who i am and they accepted me in their life as who i am.

oklah pembaca2 ( adaker )...heheheh i nak pegi breakfast dulu and mandi...nnt i sambung balik dan share my feelings and my life with u. muahhhhsssss